Banging My Head…

I am going to draw out a metaphor with this post; unlike the post just before about the cherry tree.

This afternoon a poor, little dark-eyed junco is repeatedly banging itself into one of our windows. Obviously, it must believe that there is something there it wants. Something that will help it cope better during this stressful season of mating and birth. It doesn’t get the concept of window. We had to draw the curtain so it would get the notion that whatever he thinks is hoped for beyond that window it is out of reach. Ouch! I just heard it fly into the window again.

Here’s the metaphor. Have you heard it before? Certainly! But I’m a recent self-harmer. Within the past year. I keep thinking that what I want or need is going to found by hurting myself. It makes as much sense as flying into the window over and over again. What I need or want is not going to be obtained that way. But I cannot help myself.

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